Tommy Pope – The Washy Wash – This Is Not Happening – Uncensored

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

– She’s looking at me, going,“Too long. Come now.” I’m like, “I’m trying!” I mean, I can’t piss if my brother’s on the same floor as me at this age. She’s yelling at me right here, like, “You come now! Too long!” I’m like, “I’m fucking trying!” – Welcome to “This is Not Happening.” I’m […]

President Obama’s Transgender Bathroom Backlash: The Daily Show

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

But let’s move on to a story that’s been particularly divisive over the past few weeks– the rights of transgender people. Now, with more and more states threatening to introduce restrictive bathroom bills, it was only a matter of time before the president stepped in. The Obama Administration has sent out a directive to every […]

Obama Says Goodbye & Trump (Allegedly) Gets a “Golden Shower”: The Daily Show

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

Last night, the first andlastfirst black president of the United States said his good-bye to 20,000 of his closest friends. And you could tell Obama was really the president of millennials, because the entire speech seemed like one giant subtweet. -(cheering) -Democracy does require… a basic sense of solidarity. We weaken those ties when we […]

Mark Normand – Desperate for a Shower – This Is Not Happening – Uncensored

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

– We were, like, face-to-face right here, and she was like, “Yeah, this is,” you know, blah, blah, blah, and I was like, “Oh, it’s really pretty,” and then she looks me right in the eye, and I swear to God she says, “I want you to come in my face.”[dark electronic music]♪[cheers and applause] […]

The Man Who Lives in His Shower – Mini-Mocks

By Grover Koelpin 56 comments

It may be a little unconventional, but it makes me happy. I’m Nick Hudson and I haven’t left this shower for two years. One day a couple of years ago, my wife said, “I wish I could stay in here forever,” and that’s when it clicked. I said, “I’m gonna stay in here forever.” A […]

Key & Peele – Turbulence – Uncensored

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

(Mark) He’s disgusting. Bernard? He’s disgusting. He’s not even like her. He’s an airplane technician. I mean, come on. And he talks too much. That’s why I like you. You don’t talk. You just listen. – It’s good. [bell dings] Okay. And the captain has turned on the “fasten seat belt” sign. Got a little […]

Inside Amy Schumer – Bridal Shower

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

You’re getting married. It’s such a huge deal. I can’t believe it’s happening to me. Neither can we. Psych, you’re the best. You guys are my best friends. Okay, open your presents, bitch. ( Amy ) Yes, yes, yes. Phil! I use the same kind myself. Let’s just say it really knows what it’s doing. […]

Boarding Order – Key & Peele

By Grover Koelpin 100 comments

– Good morning ladies and gentlemen, we are about to begin boarding South Northern Airlines, flight 34 to Grand Rapids. – Okay, excuse me, boarding group one. I’m gonna board in group one, excuse me, I’m in boarding group one. – And we would like to begin pre-boarding with our first class passengers. First class […]

Kyle Kinane – “I Liked His Old Stuff Better” – Drinking in the Shower

By Grover Koelpin 21 comments

– No, I fell– back in December, I fell. I fell real bad as I was, uh– I was at home. I fell in the shower. I was drunk. I was drinking in the shower. I drink in my shower. I drink in my shower, not like I need to drink so much that it […]